Saturday, December 21, 2013

A Muppet Family Christmas (A Shitmas Post by Jeff Mahady)

When it comes to the Muppets and Christmas everyone’s go to has always been The Muppet Christmas Carol. Rightfully so, but a lot of people don’t know or have forgotten about the gem that is the 1987 holiday TV special A Muppet Family Christmas. I remember my parents taping this off of TV for me. Somehow this Christmas classic ended up as part of a homemade VHS double feature with Conan The Destroyer. Makes complete sense to me or at least the 10 year old me. 
This hour long special finds the Muppets heading to Fozzie Bear’s mother’s house, uninvited, for the holidays.  Seems that Fozzie’s mother (Ma Bear) has her own plans as she’s packing for Malibu. Probably heading to some Muppet swingers resort. So to make some extra coin Ma Bear has rented her house out for the holidays to Doc and Sprocket from Fraggle Rock. Crossover alert!!  

Everyone’s plans are interrupted as the Muppet gang invades the place leading to the running joke of “Careful, the icy patch!”. I don’t care who you are, Muppets slipping and busting their ass on ice is fucking funny. This joke is used about 100 times and it never gets old. Time for an icy patch montage to prove my point. 

So with the Muppets getting silly and singing traditional Christmas songs we find out that there’s a crazy blizzard cold enough to make a snowman want to hang out inside heading their way. The catch is that Miss Piggy hasn’t arrived yet and there’s a chance she’ll freeze her little ham hocks off in the process. What happens next blew my mind as a kid. The entire Sesame Street gang (another crossover alert!!!) shows up outside singing “Deck the Halls”. This is pre-Elmo craze right here. You see his little ass singing in the back ground, but he never has a line throughout the entire special. Nowadays his name probably would be in the title.
Let’s move on to my favorite part. While looking through a closet Scooter finds a bunch of old home movies that have the Muppets first Christmas on them. Yes, the Muppet Babies in the flesh singing “Santa Clause is Coming to Town”. I use to LOOOOOVE the Muppet Babies cartoon. (There’s so much crossover going on…….. I can’t handle it!!!) The Muppet Babies were an every Saturday morning staple of my childhood and that shit needs to come to DVD.  SERIOUSLY!!!! 

Fucking Muppet Babies……….. Ok, now I have the theme song stuck in my head. I don’t want to be the only one. Take a listen. 

Ok, back to the special. Kermit’s nephew Robin finds a Fraggle hole in the house and you can see where this is going. They stumble onto some Fraggles, sing a Christmas song and teach them the meaning of Christmas. No, I will not let the Fraggle Rock theme song get stuck in my head too. 

Of course then Miss Piggy arrives just in time for the Muppets’ annual carol sing. Yes, that’s what they call it. This is the last 10 minutes of the special and it’s just the Muppets, Sesame Street gang, and the Fraggles sitting around the fireplace singing Christmas song after Christmas song. I couldn’t think of a better way to wrap things up. 

So if you’re a Muppets fan, like the rest of the world, I highly suggest checking this out or if you already have just revisit it. You can thank me later. The entire Christmas Special is available on Youtube, so treat yourself and have a very merry Shitmas. 

Love always, 
Jeff Mahady

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